A Not So Boring Life

VYZYATKA, HABAR, BAKSHEESH, PAYOLA (or A BRIBE BY ANY OTHER NAME …) “Dokuments, please.    Spaceba.   You are coming from where?  Going to where?” “And how many beers have you had, comrade?” I was ready for the question from the moment that the Kyrgyz policeman first stuck his head through the driver’s side window into the new Russian-made Niva truck.   “Beer?  I have had no beer, Officer...”  It was worth a try, wasn’t it?  But the look on his face immediately told me that it just wasn’t going to work.  “Oh, Okay.  Look, I had one beer with lunch.”  “But comrade, you must know that it is illegal in Kyrgyzstan to drink and drive.  It is the same in your country, da?”  Okay, okay – the bribe was offered, accepted and we were once again our way.  Given that we were stopped within 15 minutes after starting on our 12 hour drive SHOULD have given me an indication that it was not going to be an easy trip.  Not even CLOSE to an easy trip.

DID HE SAY NAKED?!? What could be more American than a Fourth of July weekend................ at a nudist camp?  After all, there was a parade, cookouts, volleyball, fireworks – even a skydiving demonstration.  No different than thousands of other holiday celebrations throughout the U.S.A. -just without clothing.  

I would like, someday, to try my hand at fiction.  I started one piece, based on a comment by a friend about another of these writings: he would “like to know what the group of old men in the deli were talking about when my leg broke through the ceiling over their heads”.  It has drawn me into a bit of character development based not on what happened, but on what could have occurred leading up to that moment.  I will see how it goes.  In the meantime, here is another vignette from my “Not so boring life.” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Get out of the way!  Here comes Kenny!”  Don’t think that I am making this up.  You should have absolutely no hesitation.  Anyone standing in the rectangular hallway of the third floor of the hospital-like building when this cry is heard should quickly glance over their shoulder and seek shelter in the nearest doorway or room.  Listen carefully for the sound of sneakered feet sla