¿Til Death do us Part

FOKUS MOKUS!  FOKUS MOKUS!  The chant would usually begin at about seven thirty in the morning on Saturday and Sunday.  Anywhere from five to ten children from surrounding apartments in the three-story red-brick complex located on the outskirts of the Kyrgyz city of Osh would gather outside my first floor windows, calling for me to come out and do the same magic tricks that I had unwittingly shared with them shortly after moving in.  FOKUS MOKUS!! – What I surmised was the Russian equivalent (or child’s mispronunciation) of Hocus Pocus or ‘WE WANT MORE MAGIC TRICKS!”

Now let’s be clear about this:  I am NOT a magician.  Like most youngsters of my generation, I was fascinated by the “Amazing!”, “Easy as 1-2-3!” and “Astonish your Friends!” tricks and gadgets advertised on the last page of comic books or sold in the local hobby shop:  The “Magic Connecting Rings!”; the “Nail Through the Finger Trick!”; “Disappearing Balls” and “Color Changing Handkerchiefs”.  Not to mention the card tricks.  And the itching powder.  And the plastic dog poop.  But a few dollars wasted was about all that came of my fascination.  I was never to amaze anyone, having little patience to learn and even less mechanical dexterity to pull those tricks off with any success.

 I do like and get along well with children though, and deep down have always been a closet entertainer (some would say “clown”).  So for a number of years, I have maintained three or four stock tricks to entertain any random grouping of kids that I might come across as I traveled from big city to rural isolated farm community in my various jobs as an international development worker.  If there is one truism I have encountered, it’s that no matter where you go, there are always children.  And the best way to break the ice and ensure that you are accepted into a community is to get in good with the kids.

So…my three tricks. 

The first is rather simple and has been used successfully by a vast array of child hypnotists for generations:  “Watch me pull my thumb off!”  Now there are a few tried and true ways to do this trick.  All involve some sort of masking technique – you've got to effectively hide the finger or thumb you are removing from one hand and make a finger or thumb from the other hand appear to be it.  In my case, I have (until recently – you know, old age and loss of flexibility…) been able to bend the thumb of my right hand up into my palm far enough that after closing my four fingers around it, just enough of the tip of the thumb would stick out from the little finger end to make is seem like I was holding a detached digit.   The other thumb (the one being “removed”) of course is simply hidden from view.  It’s always good to let several of the children try to remove the thumb first.  Positioning is also crucial, so that not one of the little sharpies sees you setting up the trick.  Like I said, that trick has faded from my repertoire in recent years as the flexibility has started to retreat from my joints.  Oh - and there will always be that one smart-ass kid that shouts out “HAH!  I know how you did that!”

The second magic trick is the charcoal line that passes through the skin of your hand to make an “X” on the other side.  This is probably the most popular of my entertainments, but I have had to be careful:  It is SO effective that I have had some adults in isolated indigenous communities begin to murmur things about “brujo” or “witch”.  I always try to make sure that I have a box of wooden matches for this one, lighting and letting one burn down to create the charcoal that will mark the skin on my hand.  Of course, with kids, I always do the obligatory “And we ALL know that we shouldn't play with matches, right?).  Once the match has burned down, cooled and the head is flicked off, one half-inch or so diagonal line on the palm, making sure is crosses that line that exists on the pad just below your little finger (yes, you probably figured this out already, didn't you?).  A similar line in the opposite direction on the outer part of your hand and you’re all set.  This trick requires a lot of theatricality.  Make sure the kids clearly see the straight lines on both sides, separated by that flesh.  Tell them that you are GOING TO PUSH the line on top THROUGH your hand to make AN X on the other side.  Close your hand in a fist.  Start rubbing the line on top.  GRUNT!  SWEAT IF YOU CAN! Say “OOH OOH!” as the line passes through your hand.  And then…. Open your hand, palm outward towards the expectant audience and say, simply, “LOOK!”  Don’t bother to check yourself.  Let them see you are confident!  And there, on the other side, will be THE X!   As I mentioned, be careful with this trick in certain settings.  I have had men and women in rural communities start to back away, wide-eyed, at the thought that I actually DID pass that line through the flesh of my hand.  Fortunately, I never noticed any stakes being sharpened or bonfires lit.

The rest of my “FOCUS MOCUS” repertoire is, I have to admit, rather pathetic.  Hold both hands out in front of you, one finger held open on each, started moving them back and forth toward each other until BAM! – you slap them together and the outstretched finger on one hand disappears and a second finger appears on the other!  WOW!   You can make it go back to the other hand as well!  Or (there ARE four, aren’t there?) making two separate circles with the thumb and forefinger of each hand, turning quickly to the side and rear and VOILA!  When they return they are magically interlocked!

Yes, pretty sad ending.  But the first two tricks are usually enough to get me accepted by the children of any place I visit.  And from there, gaining the trust of the adults is just a short step away.  Of course, the disadvantage is that once I would go through my act, I have to spend the rest of the time being bombarded with requests to “DO IT AGAIN! DO IT AGAIN!” and, as in the situation in Kyrgyzstan where I started this story, the sad lack of any opportunity to sleep in on a Saturday morning.